Connection > Attachment
Knowing when to leave the party and claim your actual freedom.
“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.”
~ Ann Landers
con·nec·tion
/kəˈnekSH(ə)n/
noun
a relationship in which a person, thing, or idea is linked or associated with something else.
at·tach·ment
/əˈtaCHmənt/
noun
an extra part or extension that is or can be attached to something to perform a particular function.
Growing up is hard to do.
We need people.
Or, at least we think we need certain people.
Need…such a funny word.
To me, it denotes a sense of lack, as if being ‘without’ wipes away all proper function as an adult. There is no proper you. We have this ability to see a need and/or a want in things, situations, groups that seem to have what we desire. Yes, we need water, food, shelter (that last one is debatable) for a healthy existence. However, this need I am pensively ruminating on today is the need for certain relationships.
It may feel that you ‘need’ someone in your life otherwise you would be broke or lonely, or lost without them. Alternatively, they would be lost, broke(n) or lonely without you. Without them you would lack some material or emotional stability. Without you they might have to step up and lead their own life. Guilt is a helluva heavy trap.
It is a beautiful thing to have a true symbiotic connection with another person, however, when we cross the line into want/need, we can become attached holding a rose-colored glazed. In my view, attachment is the easiest and fastest way to become energetically drained by these relationships. We all have a story about that ex-someone that we stayed with too long. We have all had that family member we had to mentally prepare to see but cannot bring ourselves to stand up against because “they’re just like that.” On the flip side, we may have ditched said relationships too soon out of fear of commitment, fear of abandonment, etc. running from the lessons we have yet to learn. To severe or not to severe, that is the question.
Toxic Loyalty
It is one thing to be loyal, it is another to practice toxic loyalty.
I will do anything to support my friends and family. These symbiotic relationships challenge me, enlighten me and flow with my truest identity. These connections are important to me and I am loyal to them. I am on call 24/7 for them. However, I do not need them.
Toxic loyalty, in my opinion, is when we cross the threshold into becoming manipulated, mentally and/or emotionally, through our attachments to these once seemingly healthy relationships. Skipping over that line can happen in the blink of an eye.
Next thing you know you’re “stuck” or guilt ridden into feeding the attachment because it is uncomfortable to be without them, “they” will be challenged to move on, you will need to find new employment, blah blah. Toughen up kid. Know when it’s time to leave the party. We can all OD on attachments.
From a macro perspective this ‘other’ doesn’t have to be a person. These attachments could also show up as a political agenda, a commerce driven high (retail therapy), reclusiveness, addiction to fucking anything, hate/distain for a specific group or ideology, race supremacy (black/white), etc. There are so many examples to pull from. We can become attached to anything and not even know until it is too late.
Consequently, these attachments often become brick laden walls between what we truly desire our life to be and a shameful fear of freedom and power. Our peace is the first to go. This conditionality is an untruth to the organic hue-man. (See: Gold Blooded)
Attachments are the vines that chokes the high-conscious race we are blooming into.
Permanency is an illusion
When we are connected, all that is will flow. People will come and go. Those that compliment your authenticity and hold their own sovereignty will ride the wave of life with you. They are allowed to ride that same wave out of your life at the appropriate time, without white-knuckle control.
Nothing and no one is meant to stay forever. Acceptance of this fact is crucial to the true harmonic union of self, your Peach Power. Your ability to truly be who you are— without fear of judgement or nonacceptance— is the key to the true symbiosis that lies all around you.
As creative beings we tend to be the ones most likely to go our own way in regard to group and social dynamics. Our beautiful black-sheepness. It is our personal romantic and familial relationships that seem to morph into attachments that drain us, age us and steal our mental and emotional peace. Our Peach Power disappears without us even knowing. We deserve to experience the liberation of symbiosis, true connectivity.
So, if this vibes with you ask yourself if you have a white-knuckle grip on someone or something. Whether it be your political affiliation, parent, career, spouse or your best friend.
The true test is in how gracefully we let go.
How can we create more symbiotic connections and severe the attachments that drain us and negatively influence our true identification of self?
Who are you without toxic loyalty?
Who are you without need?
*Due to a new member to the family there may be a short break in content. All rants, philosophical discussions and intentional recipes will be coming back in a few weeks. Thank you for your patience.*
Purple Peach loves you!
I just read the Ann Landers quote and skim through the first half. I am saving this for later after I run to the store. I wanted to say that quote was meant for me. I held onto almost a 35 year toxic marriage because I thought I was strong. It took The hand of God in a traumatic event to pull me out of that relationship. Thank you for your confirmation and guidance. I will be back to comment more! 💜✨💜✨💜🍑
Well said, and Congratulations!